Three reasons I know unicorns are real.

The real question we all should be asking (disregarding the origins of life and how ramen noodles can be both cheap AND delicious) is whether or not unicorns are real.  The great news is that I’m here to tell you that they are.  Here are three bullet proof theories to prove that our magical friends are really out there:

ONE! They’re in the Bible.

Unicorns. Yes, Unicorns. I repeat, you are not hallucinating. My friends, they’re in the Bible. Not only does the good book mention my mystical spirit animal once– but they’re in there SEVEN times. (and seven is a lucky number, so im just gonna go ahead and assume that means good things for this theory– ya dig?) Need the proof? Read’em and weep, or jump up and down with pure joy, thats what I’ll be doing. 

 Numbers 23:22 (KJV)

“God brought them out of Egypt; he hath as it were the strength of an unicorn.”

Deuteronomy 33:17 (KJV)

“His glory is like the firstling of his bullock, and his horns are like the horns of unicorns…”

Job 39: 9 (KJV)

Will the unicorn be willing to serve thee, or abide by thy crib?

Psalm 29:6 (KJV)

He maketh them also to skip like a calf; Lebanon and Sirion like a young unicorn.

Psalm 22:21 (KJV)

Save me from the lion’s mouth: for thou hast heard me from the horns of the unicorns.

Psalm 92:10 (KJV)

But my horn shalt thou exalt like the horn of an unicorn: I shall be anointed with fresh oil.

Isaiah 34:7 (KJV)

And the unicorns shall come down with them, and the bullocks with the bulls; and their land shall be soaked with blood, and their dust made fat with fatness.

Count’em, seven. I’m not making this stuff up!

TWO! They’re historical.

They are in SO many ancient legends and have shown up in writings and all kinds’a old stuff in a bunch of different cultures. I mean c’mon, you’re telling me that there are ancient discoveries in Chinese, Japanese, Indian, Greek, German, and Scottish cultures that all have Unicorns as a common denomenator and we still can’t admit that they’re real. 

All of your dreams are coming true.. I know. But I have one more point to make. 

THREE! Who the..?

My final statement is this: Who in their right mind would come up with the idea of a beautiful-majestic-magical-sparkling-white horse with a rainbow horn (and maybe wings.. wishful thinking.)? This insane picture could not have been created on purely human thought. Lets be honest, no human could dream up something as spectacular as a unicorn. No way. 

I dare you to deny their existence now. Ha! 

xo
laurie